Red arrows indicate unrequited sexual feelings towards the character being pointed at.
A - Laird of the Manor. Porphyria has left him completely mad. Is living off his inheritance, the locals humour his delusion that he is a professional inventor even though all he ever does is stick bits of rubbish together. Has a servant left over from his father's days who he forces to pretend to be a robot butler.
B - Was witness to a gangland shooting in New York, was put on the Witness Protection Scheme in Balamory as he now has a price on his head.
C - Lesbian.
D - Dementia. Penny has taken pity on her and taken her in.
E - Used to be a vigilante, took a bullet to the spine while trying to apprehend a villain. Knows Spencer's secret, has vowed to protect him should he ever be discovered.
A - was jilted on the eve of her Wedding, still wears the dress sometimes.
B - Their marriage is a sham, since he is clearly gay. She's been his best friend since school, this is all to appease his horribly right-wing parents.
C - Used to be a crack addict and a street walker, has cleaned up her act since having her son, knows cleaning the buses at night is the best job she's likely to get, and it beats giving blowjobs in alleys for drugs money.
Pathetic, eh? Don't even get me started on In The Night Garden (Coma Dream) and Little Red Tractor (Farmer desperately trying to get into a young widow's knickers by befriending her kids).
- I am mostly feeling...:
silly
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But there is something going on between those two - they even went on holiday together... and don't get me started on what happened with the pantomime horse.
PS - while we are on the subject of In the Fricking Night Garden, I must thank you for that Jarvis Crocker link the other day - it was the only song that stopped me singing the bloody Night Garden theme tune.
You saved my brain.
Nah, Edie's got it bad for Miss Hoolie.
Hmm... it's probably better to absent mindedly sing 'yes, my name is Igglepiggle' than 'cunts are still running the world' in front of the Pups!
Pantomime Horse.
That's all I'm saying.
"absent mindedly sing 'yes, my name is Igglepiggle' than 'cunts are still running the world' in front of the Pups"
In a sense, yes, but in reality.... no. I HATE that song - and it's even worse since Sir Derek sings it out of tune and OUT OF TIME.
ARGH.
Fortunately for me, the transition period between songs was when they were both out at school/nursery. I have since moved on to writing music, so all is good!
Well done, Sir Derek.
See, Stephen Tompkinson half-heartedly singing the 'Little Red Tractor' theme tune is much worse for me.
Writing music? Cool!
Edited at 2008-10-02 08:45 pm (UTC)
Josie's a bit flat to have an angsty backstory really - although I do like how (the originl one, at least) was so very bad at football and basketball when professing in her song to be excellent at them. She bounces and kicks a ball like I do!
In the Nikkibeth household, In The Night Garden is one of the Seven Circles of Hell - we've spent altogether too much time assigning back-stories to the characters...
Sadly, the day I realised that Dr Juno and Chuck really are meant to be a lesbian couple was a highlight of my CBeebies-watching life1
I don't mind ITNG, but Igglepiggle's definitely dreaming the whole thing as he slowly dies on his little boat, and Makka Pakka's definitely Obsessive Compulsive.
And we reckon there's a little purple Pontypine child that they don't like to talk about.
I like the purple Pontypine child. Makka-Pakka's a little bit Lady Macbeth, we think...
Why, yes, I do need to get out more, now that you mention it...
And what's the deal with Rudy - is he blind, or partially sighted, or what?
And so that means Mickey-John and Bobbie are actually the only Single Parents?
And are Chuck & Louie named after Chuck Berry and Louie Armstrong?
SO MANY QUESTIONS!
It's still the poor man's Balamory, though!
He used to be a high flier in the Met, but he bungled big time on a raid, ruined years of covert operations and ended up getting three of his team critically injured in a shoot-out. He got demoted and sent to Balamory, where no crimed ever occur...
...Until, of course, the gang that's after Spencer turn up.
Oh, there will be blood, my friend. There will be blood.